Mental health struggles are often silent battles that many individuals face, and media personality and the host of the popular gospel show, 'Crossover 101' on NTV Susan Grace knows this all too well.
NTV's Susan Grace tearfully narrates how stepdad ruined her teenage years
When Susan Grace told her mum about the things her stepdad was doing, she dismissed and blamed her for hanging out with him
Speaking on Lynn Ngugi show on September 3, she discussed how she battled depression, self-harm, and thoughts of suicide due to a series of painful events.
Susan hopes that her story will inspire others who may be facing similar struggles to seek professional help and overcome their challenges.
Susan Grace's challenging childhood
Susan's story begins with her mother, whom she acknowledges as a great woman but feels could have done more to protect her during her childhood.
Susan's mother remained in a relationship with a boyfriend who was abusive, and Susan wished her mother had taken action to remove him from their lives.
Additionally, Susan reflects on the lack of guidance about relationships, especially with boys, which left her vulnerable to exploitative situations.
Susan Grace living with her grandmother
Due to her mother's situation, Susan spent much of her childhood living with her grandmother.
While she describes her grandmother as energetic, she also experienced physical abuse and hurtful words from her.
The constant belittling and verbal abuse took a severe toll on Susan's mental health, making her feel worthless.
"The thing that hurt me the most are the words that came out of her mouth. She would constantly call me a useless child," she shared.
Susan Grace - Living with my mum felt awkward
As the situation became unbearable, Susan reached out to her mother, asking to leave her grandmother's home. She hoped to find refuge with her mother, who had the means to provide for her.
However, living with her mother proved to be awkward and distant, leaving Susan feeling like a burden.
At her lowest point, Susan even wrote a suicide note, apologizing for intruding on her mother's life and attempting to take her own life with an overdose. Fortunately, her suicide attempt was unsuccessful.
"She had the resources, so in my head, I was like, why didn't she want to bring me to her house?" Susan reflected.
Susan Grace reveals how her mum's boyfriend abused her
Susan's situation worsened when her mother introduced her to a boyfriend who later became abusive.
This man began making inappropriate advances towards her, manipulating her with promises of love and marriage.
Susan, still in high school and not yet 18, felt trapped and scared. When she confided in her mother about the abuse, she was met with disbelief and blame. This response shattered Susan's trust and left her feeling utterly alone.
"He would deliberately piss my mum off so he could take me with him to his house. I told my mum about this, but the response shook me by surprise. She said, 'You're the one who always hangs out with him.' That hurt," Susan said.
Feeling unsupported and unheard, she grappled with the weight of her experiences.
"My mum was great, but I would honestly say she failed me," Susan reflects. "When I was a child, she couldn't come through for me. When her boyfriend was doing his thing, she didn't kick him out. She could have done something."
Susan longed for her mother to sit her down and have those important conversations about life, relationships, and boundaries.
"I wish she had prepared me for when her boyfriend started telling me to go to his house. I would have known to say no," Susan said.
Susan Grace finds healing
In the aftermath of these painful episodes, Susan began to spiral into depression, and her mental health deteriorated.
Over time, her mother began to realise that her daughter was suffering, but the damage had already been done. Susan's emotional scars ran deep.
Following high school, Susan and her mother began to rebuild their relationship, but fate had other plans. Tragically, Susan's mother passed away in January.
At her mother's funeral, Susan's father, who had been absent for most of her life, suddenly appeared.
Susan, feeling abandoned by him when she needed support, dismissed his attempts to connect. She chose to maintain her distance from him, and to this day, she has no strong feelings toward him.
"I told him, 'When I needed you to show up for me, you didn't. Let's just be like that,' she said.
Today, Susan Grace stands as a testament to the resilience of the human spirit. She has overcome immense challenges, and her experiences have shaped her into the woman she is today.
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