Things you shouldn't say during sex
May all your ups and downs be between the sheets.
You know, those embarrassing little farts that pop out of nowhere, or trying out a new position that you both can’t get the hang of. It’s normal, you laugh about it and continue getting busy.
But then again there are those little hellish moments we create for ourselves that can completely throw off the mood. Most times you didn’t mean to say it out loud but you did and now you have to face an awkward thirty minutes of apologizing before you get lucky.
Save yourself the hustle, here are a things you shouldn't say when having sex.
1. That was fast
Well, you could have been referring to just how quickly he pulled off your bra or how fast he got you ready for action but best believe, no man wants to hear those three little words. They go hand in hand with I love during a night stand.
2. I’ll do it myself
It can be a bit frustrating when you’re trying to get in the mood and your partner has zero idea about how to pleasure you. It goes unsaid but a lot of people are insecure about their ability to please in bed. Instead of offering to bring yourself to peak, direct your partner on what to do. Its sexy learning each other’s body, also imagine just how sexy it is if he/she brings you to peak while you watch.
3. I can’t feel you
(Cringe) There’s no positive side to this, it’s like saying he threw a hot dog down a hallway. First of all, a hallway is pretty huge but then again a hot dog is pretty small. Get the picture? This would be the ultimate self-tackle.
4. By the way…
Don’t be surprised if your partner breaks into cold sweat at the utterance of these words. It’s safe to say that no sentence that starts like this during sex is usually positive and no one is really sure what’s about to come next, ‘ I’m pregnant, I’ve got chlamydia or hey, imagine your best friend is bigger?’ Scary, very scary!
5. I love you
Let’s get this straight, unless the two of you are seriously dating or married, avoid cupid manenos and stick to gibberish. The amount of sexy in that will be determined by just how good you sound moaning.
6. Speaking of moaning, can you not mention names
While a firefighter will give you strict instructions to follow during fire breakouts, sex gurus will tell you to keep off the names unless you’re only sexually interested in one person only. Otherwise, Kevin will bring his A game and you’ll thank Jones for it. Not very pleasant, is it?
7. You want to do what?
You’re probably a very simple person, you know, never asking for more than just that bend-me-over-lift-my-legs-like-you’re-changing-my-diapers-daddy kind of sex but here comes Mr Lover with a new idea. While you may find it absurd, you don’t have to shoot it down. Instead, give it a try and if you don’t like it just inform your partner about it. Another way to go about it is just tell them in the most polite way that you don’t feel comfortable and suggest something else that’s fun.
Want to add on to our list? What are some of the things you avoid saying during sex?
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