Worship Leader divorces wife after years of witholding conjugal rights

The Nakuru man said they've only been intimate 5 times since they got married in 2016.

Stock photo of a couple arguing

A church official in Nakuru has divorced his wife over allegations of being attracted to other women.

According to a report by the Standard, the couple’s names were hidden during the court case which was heard by Principal magistrate Yvonne Khatambi.

The man who was referred to as FJO told the court that he had met the woman on Facebook in 2015 and it was not after getting married that he realised she wasn’t attracted to him.

He explained that even after they got married in 2016, it took 8 months of waiting to get intimate with her.

The man described himself as a worship leader and music trainer at a church in Nakuru and had tried to seek other avenues of mediation with his wife.

According to FJO, pressure from their families forced her to confess that she was attracted to women.

He disclosed to the court that they had only been intimate 5 times during their 5-year marriage, the last time being in 2017, the same year she was pregant with their only son.

I lost interest in the marriage. I felt embarrassed I was a worship leader. I even stopped going to church as a result of embarrassment,” he told the magistrate.

More to the emotional disconnect, he also accused her of not supporting his career.

The woman did not bother to file a defence or appear in any of the divorce proceedings and as such Principal magistrate Khatambi finalised the divorce.

“It is evident that both parties are no longer interested in the marriage and that there is no possibility of reconciliation. In the absence of any other position to the contrary, I hereby dissolve the marriage between the petitioner (FJO) and the respondent (PNM),” reads the judgment delivered on Tuesday, September 7, 2021.

Unlike many other countries, in Kenya's divorce system, those who want to divorce must prove a violation of the marriage on the part of the other spouse.

This is different from most Western countries including the UK which allows divorce based on consent.

The Kenyan Divorce process is governed by the Marriage Act Number 4 of 2014.

Under Section 65 of the Act, persons who contracted a Christian marriage can petition for divorce on the following grounds;

(a) One or more acts of adultery committed by the other party;

(b) Cruelty, whether mental or physical, inflicted by the other party on the Petitioner, or on the children, if any of the marriage;

(c) Desertion by either party for a period of at lead three years before the presentation of the divorce petition;

(d) Exceptional depravity by either party

(e) The irretrievable breakdown of marriage.

It is worth noting that all these must be offences done by the other person other than the person seeking for divorce. Thus, one cannot commit adultery and then rush to court for divorce on the basis of his/her own matrimonial fault. It must be a fault on the party of the other party.

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