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'I think my mother hates me' - Here's what to do when you feel this way

Navigating complex emotions within the family dynamic can be challenging, but here's how to address and heal when you feel a strained relationship with your mother.

A sad youth

Growing up, we've all heard the saying, 'mother's love is unconditional'. But what if your reality feels starkly different?

What if every interaction with your mother feels like a tug of war, each word exchanged like a dagger to the heart? What if you're trapped in a whirlpool of emotions, thinking, 'my mother hates me'?

For some, this sentiment isn't just a fleeting thought but a consistent feeling. The weight of such a belief can be devastating, leading to feelings of isolation, self-doubt, and intense pain.

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It can make one question their self-worth and their place in the world.

Understanding such feelings is complicated. Sometimes, generational differences, unspoken traumas, or personal struggles can create an emotional rift between a parent and a child.

It's also possible that your mother might be battling her internal demons, unknowingly projecting her pain and frustration onto you.

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1. Open the channels of communication

While it's daunting, initiate a calm and non-confrontational conversation. Express your feelings without accusing. Remember, understanding begins with listening.

2. Seek counseling

A professional therapist or counselor can provide an unbiased perspective and guide you through the labyrinth of your emotions.

3. Self-care

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Surround yourself with positive influences. Friends, hobbies, and personal passions can provide solace during turbulent times.

4. Extend a helping hand, anonymously

Sometimes, the root of the problem isn't visible on the surface. If you believe your mother might be struggling with her mental or emotional well-being, consider seeking help for her.

She will never know that it's you who reached out for her, eliminating any fear of further friction or misunderstandings. It's a quiet way of saying, "I care, and I want to help."

The emotional journey of feeling unloved, especially by someone as pivotal as a mother, is unimaginably painful.

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But remember, life has a way of healing and mending broken ties. Take steps, both for your well-being and hers. Sometimes, the darkest nights lead to the brightest dawns.

Through understanding, communication, and care, the bond can be rediscovered and rejuvenated.

Your story doesn't end here; it's just a chapter, and with effort and empathy, happier chapters await.

Editor's Note: Mindful Kenya offers mental health services on short USSD code *702*30#. By following the prompts a person seeking professional mental healthcare is linked with a specialist under guarantee of anonymity.

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