We all have different characteristics and personalities. This difference can make it hard for us to live with one another.
Nisaidie na chumvi kidogo, yangu imeisha tu sahii!
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Since we don’t get to decide who to live with, sometimes we find ourselves living with interesting and peculiar neighbors who can be irritating at times. Some can be good and reliable while others can be a pain in the neck, making you regret why you ever moved into the neighborhood.
Here are some of the different types of neighbors you are likely to meet in your neighborhood.
The borrower
This type of neighbor is always running out of things; Sugar, salt, matchbox, omo, cooking oil etc. If he borrows your charger, he will take 48-hours to return it. These type of people should be grateful but you will be surprised by how rude and impolite they always are.
The fighting couple
This is the type of couple that everyone is always complaining about. When they fight, everyone will know since they are dramatic, loud and petty. They will break windows, utensils and even hurt other neighbors in the process.
Every time they fight, they always vow to break up but its been 4 years now.
Party freaks
They are a complete nightmare. They will throw a loud party at 1 am in the night and you will do nothing about it. They will scream and shout until your ears bleed.
The complainer
Nothing is ever good enough for this neighbor. They will always complain about everything, from the water shortages, the black outs, the crying babies, the noisy neighbors, everything. These kind of people are usually irritated easily and have a short temper.
The drug lord
You will always have that neighbor who has or can access alcohol or other types of drugs at any time. When people want to have a good time, he is the life of the party.
The one allergic to clothes
There are neighbors who get allergic to clothes when staying indoors. They will walk around in towels, or vests and tiny shorts. Others will be comfortable with a very light lesso tied on their chest. The ones with big behinds will make sure they bend a lot until you see their behinds.
The shouter
God created them with a boombox in their throat. They will greet you and all the people in the neighborhood will know that Kevo said Hi. Even when they are discussing private matters, they will shout at the top of their voices. Whenever they are not around, the building is quiet.
The player
This is the guy your mama warned you about. He might not be good looking but he always has a way with ladies.
Every time this guy brings different women and mama wa ploti fear him since he chases anything in a skirt.
The homeless one
Have you ever had a neighbor who loves staying at another neighbor’s place such that you cannot even tell their house?
Once they get home, they will go play FIFA, cook, gossip and watch movies at their neighbor’s place. The only time you will find them at home is when they are sleeping.
The noisy one
You will always find that one neighbor who loves noise more than he loves his girlfriend. He will play loud boring music when people are asleep and keep banging doors for no reason.
Upstairs neighbors are usually loud and irritating. One minute they are quite and before you know it they are dragging two elephants and running Juacali business just above you.
Lakini shida ya hawa majirani wa juu inakuanga nini?
The mysterious neighbor
He barely talks to anyone. Leaves early in the morning and comes back late. He never receives visitors, plays loud music or smiles to other people. You will never know what he does or who he really is.
The gossiper
If you want to know the latest gossip in the building, this one will tell you everything. From how Baba Kamau was caught with a mpango wa kando to the care taker sleeping with Cate the choir master who lives at the 2nd floor.
The dirty unkempt neighbor
Despite of the availability of soap and water, this one is always dirty. They will always have dirty clothes, dirty dishes, dirty shoes outside their doorstep and dusty houses.
The rich neighbor
When other people are busy complaining about the ‘hard’ economy, this guy is never broke. He is always loaded and has numerous deals bringing him money. He is always travelling, buying expensive items and his fridge is always stocked.
Sometimes you will wonder why the hell he is living in your neighborhood.
The Chef
This one is always passionate about cooking and tying out new recipes. He has a lot of friends and gets plenty of visitors every time he cooks.
The one who wants to date you
There will always be that one neighbor who thinks you are their soulmate. They will try hard to get your attention, invite you for supper or drinks and try to make you see why you two were meant to be together.
They never get tired of pursuing you.
The one who never works
This one is a stay at home buddy. He doesn’t have a job but lives a better lifestyle than yours. He is always going to concerts, trips and knows of the latest joint in towns.
The one who cooks weird food
Ever had a neighbor who cooks weird food? Like you don’t even know what he cooks, but he is always cooking things and coming up with new recipes.
The fishy neighbor
You never know how many people live in your neighbors house, but normally people are always streaming in. Sometimes you think they are drug dealers, thieves but you can never tell, something is always going on in that house.
The musician
It might be a band or an upcoming artiste staying in your building. They will practice at the middle of the night or sing at the top of their voices when you really need to get some rest.
The stalker
Some neighbors will invest in your life as if they get paid for that. They know what time you leave and the people you bring in your house. And some even know what meal you cooked on Friday evening when Jane came to visit you.
Kind hearted one
This one rarely gossips or gets caught in any sort of drama. He will say hi to you, fix your television and even pick your clothes from the hanging lines when its raining.