Ian Wekesa, a former Computer Science student at Moi University, had his love life all figured out at some point. It was all love and roses with his then-girlfriend, they were comfortable enough to move in together.
My girlfriend got pregnant by another man when I got depressed - Ian Wekesa's story
Ian suffered paralysis for four months because of depression, and during that time, the woman he had believed would never cheat on him fell pregnant by another man.
However, things would soon go haywire after he fell into a depression that paralysed his arms, legs, and speech for four months.
At his lowest, his girlfriend fell pregnant by another man and moved away, leaving Ian with a broken heart.
Trying to impress ladies with money as a 1st-year
Like many people, Ian never realised that he was falling into depression. He had been leading a fake life on campus, trying to impress two ladies by paying their bills out of his pocket.
Hardly did he know that this would be the onset of a long journey battling depression.
“My depression story started when I was in my first year on campus, in 2017. I was trying to impress two ladies before I got together with my girlfriend. I would take them out for meals, pay for events, and sort their bills with my pocket money and this didn’t go well, I couldn’t sustain it.
"However, depression did not manifest immediately. It just built up in my mind slowly and by the time I was moving in with my girlfriend, I was already depressed but I had no idea,” he narrates.
Things went from bad to worse when Ian began to lash out at people, a state he refers to as "going crazy".
“I was stealing girls’ clothes on the hanging lines and hiding them, and insulting people randomly. I just wanted the girls to suffer but my mind was unconscious at that time.
"The relationship with my girlfriend was perfect until I got crazy and she had to call my mum. My mum had me boarded into a matatu to Nairobi, where I was taken to the hospital,” Ian recalls.
Ian Wekesa's medical diagnosis and treatment
Ian was diagnosed with acute Organic Brain Syndrome, a type of mental health condition that later resulted in Bipolar Disorder.
He remained in hospital for three weeks and was discharged before his full recovery to manage the hospital bills that were beginning to pile up.
For the next three months, Ian lay on the sofa, helpless and paralysed, and his girlfriend decided to move out.
While still laying on the sofa in his condition, Ian got a WhatsApp message that transformed his life for good.
“After the fourth month on the sofa, I received a WhatsApp video of my classmates praying for my healing. These are classmates I never talked to because I was an introvert and here they were praying for my healing.
"After watching that touching video, I jumped up miraculously straight from that paralysis! I was healed miraculously!” Ian recounts.
Ian still believed that their relationship was intact and he would only find out that she had moved on and gotten pregnant, months after he had recovered from the paralysis.
“The moment I got paralysed, she got pregnant by another man. I believe she experienced what I have come to learn is called compassion fatigue.
"I would still visit her where she was living at the time, this is after my recovery, even though she showed signs of pregnancy. I ignored the signs because I believed she loved me and would never cheat on me,” Ian recounts vividly.
Ian, who is still on medication and regular therapy advises young people to speak up whenever they are going through something to avoid having major mental health issues.
The 29-year-old now volunteers as a mental health advocate even as he looks for a job to sustain himself and pay for his medicines.
Editor's Note: Mindful Kenya offers mental health services on short code *702*30#. By following the prompts a person seeking professional mental healthcare is linked with a specialist under a guarantee of anonymity.
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