Impressing your future mother-in-law is a must if you want to have a good relationship with her.
Many a times, ladies complain of having a terrible relationship with their in-laws. While I understand that some in laws can be straight up difficult and hard to impress, sometimes it's also up to you as their future daughter-in-law to make them see that you're worthy of their love. Your boyfriend's mother will test you and watch you closely to see if you will make a good wife or not. The day he takes you home to meet his parents is a very crucial step and you must be on your best behavior. If you have been dating for over a year or two, soon enough, if your man is serious about you, he will introduce you to his family and when he does, be sure to follow these tips if you want to impress them.
1. Dress to impress, but decently.
First impressions are everything. This is not the time to look like a slay queen. Look like a presentable wife. The perfect outfit is a decent skater dress that's not too revealing and one that does not compromise on your style. Go easy on the makeup too so as not to come off as someone that tries way too hard.
2. Ask your boyfriend what to expect.
It's always wise to ask your bae what the situation is likely to be like. Ask him what his parents like and what they dislike so that there are no surprises when you arrive.
3. Go bearing gifts.
You simply cannot visit an African home empty-handed. Even a small foodstuff shopping will be appreciated. It's a good gesture.
4. Be polite and smile.
"Sasa mama Ben" that's not the way to greet your future mother-in-law. Greet the parents with utmost respect even if it means a small bow or holding your arm to show respect.
5. Do not be a know-it-all.
Listen more, talk less. This is the chance for you to get acquainted with those close to the man you love. Talk about him, ask questions about his childhood, tell them things you love and your passions and life goals. Of course, this is not an opportunity for you to gloat about how you love going to nightclubs every Friday but more on your life aspirations and to show what you bring to the table as a potential future wife.
6. Help around the home.
By this, I do not mean that you should tie a lesso and start mboching services. I actually do not agree with that myself. However, raising your feet on the couch and unleashing your phone to scroll through your Insta is not what you need to do either. Help with a little chores here and there like offering to do dishes or help with serving food, cooking, etc. Small chores will be appreciated and they will see that you're a woman who can take care of a home.
7. Have basic manners.
You know, sit like a lady, have table manners and carry yourself in a polite, charming and sophisticated manner.
8. Avoid PDA.
Even if you feel like kissing your boyfriend, that's not the time and place. In fact, in most African homes, the couple is not allowed to spend the night together so do respect that. It's uncomfortable for the parents to watch you two pack on the PDA.
9. Argue behind closed doors if you must.
Sure, things do go awry in gatherings like those. But, if you do get into an argument with your boyfriend while at his parents, do not make it obvious that the two of you are fighting. Argue and resolve the conflict behind closed doors. Mothers-in-law can really add salt to the injury sometimes. Your bae's mom may see you arguing and she dismisses you by telling her son,"Vile nimeona, huyu hamtawezana!"
10. Follow family traditions if any.
If the whole family sits by the dinning table during meal times, do just that. If they pray before breakfast, join in. If everyone wakes up at a certain time, follow suit. When in Rome, do as the Romans do.
11. Do not stress.
Take it easy, don't try too hard to impress, just be your well mannered self and if you fail to impress the first time, there will be many other occasions in the near future for you to bounce back and show them what your boo saw in you.