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8 things you should not do after a break up

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Do not revenge, leave it to karma

play Things not do after a breakup (Courtesy)

We have all been through a breakup and I always say that breakups are brutal. Very brutal.

But, in my unsolicited opinion, I feel that when a relationship is over, both partners should be cordial about it. End it in a mature way. Do not beat yourself down about the breakup, relationships and friendships come to an end, it’s part of life, it’s part of our growth process. In life, the only thing that’s constant is change. When you break up with someone, the best thing you can do is take a small break from dating and work on yourself. But you should never do these things.  

1. Do not maintain friendship IRL or on social media.

It’s really hard, but that’s what’s good for you. If you keep seeing them, you will feel sad and even feel like contacting them and that will not help you move on. And while still on social media, do not stalk them to see who they are now dating and what they’re up to. Again, that will not help you move on, which is the goal, after you break up with someone.

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2. Do cry and get it over and done with.

Seriously, cry, as much as you want to. Let it all out, punch the walls if you have to. But do so then get over and done with it. It’s normal to feel broken and stressed out after a break up. It’s also normal to want to be alone. However, this takes me to the next point,

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3. Don’t wallow in sadness.

Don’t be alone, locked up in your room, wallowing in the miasma of sadness. It will not help you. Do not say no when your friends offer to take you out. Leave the house, get out there, do something fun, something that will take your mind off your ex. This is the only way you will start moving on with your life.

4. Do not beg your ex to get back with you.

Never get to that point. You deserve better. Way better and there’s someone out there for you. Begging someone comes off as desperate and makes it seem like without them, you’re nothing.

5. Do not revenge.

The best revenge is happiness. Imagine your ex seeing you happy, glowing, thriving and living your best damn life? Trust me, that’s the best revenge ever. If your ex did you wrong, leave it to karma.

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6. Do not publicly shame them or talk about private things such as their manhood online.

We have seen cases of people shaming their partners publicly after a breakup, especially celebrity couples. Some girls always come out to say how the guy had a small dick or how bad his dick game was and such. We also see men who come out to shame the woman saying things like the vagina stank and what not. Funny enough, these same couples never complain about the sex when they’re together. They will put up pictures and hashtag #MINE but the minute they breakup, suddenly, the vagina smells and the dick is tiny lol. Grow up! Seriously though. Those are private matters that should never be used to shame each other in public.

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ALSO READ: Vera Sidika spills the beans with details of Otile Brown's manhood

7. Do not hate all men because of one breakup.

No, not all men are trash. We get that your ex did you wrong. But like earlier mentioned, take time to heal and work on yourself and when you’re ready to date again, put yourself out there and be open to meeting new people. One breakup should not make you give up on love forever or become a lesbian. There’s hope at the end of the tunnel lol.

8. Don’t be self-destructive.

Taking drugs, over-drinking and getting depressed will only lead to self-destruction and it will be really hard to get out of that pit-hole. Such behavior can even lead to suicide. The best way to heal is to give yourself time, think about what went wrong in the relationship and think about what you want from your next relationship. Stay active and don't let life stop, pick up your pieces and move on.

ALSO READ: 11 lame phrases men use to breakup

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